Blog,  Jalika's Dating Advice

How To Let A Man Be A Man

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I know what it’s like to be a single mom. I’m so used to being independent and making all of the decisions. ”Whatever I Say Goes” being my motto and standing by it because it’s just me. I spent a few years dating man-children because I didn’t think a real man would put up with my shit. After the last one, I took a couple of years to work on myself and vowed to be alone. I guess I was only fooling myself.

In walked a man that was different. To this day he shows me what it is to be a man even though it is so hard for me to let him be that. I’m still learning, and I’m constantly told: “you’re not in this alone anymore”. MY problems became OUR problems and MY successes became OUR successes and vice versa. He tells me daily that all he wants is to make me happy and I always ask” what about you?”. He believes it is his job as a man to keep me happy while I believe we both should be happy.

One way to make a man happy is to let a man be a man. You can still be independent but know that it is okay to let someone else take the reins. I know, I know. Shut Up! Just sit back and read what I have to say. You deserve to be treated like a Queen just as much as a man deserves to be treated like a king. Here’s how it’s done!  In order to let a man be a man you must let him:

 

1. The Door For You

I know you can open the door yourself but why should you when a man is present? There is no reason for you to touch a door handle when he is around. It is his job as a man to open and close the door for you.

2. Make Decisions

He is very much capable of making decisions. Of course, he’ll run the decisions by you sometimes when it is necessary. Big decisions should be a team effort though.

3. Fix It

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Is something broken? He can either call a specialist or do it himself. Running out of gas? He’s already checked and is going to fill up your tank. You can even let him change your breaks for you to avoid paying an arm and a leg for nothing. The first time that was ever done for me I almost cried because no man has ever done anything like that for me before.

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4. Take care of you

Let him pay a bill or two if that’s what he wants. Even if it’s just grooming bills such as hair and nails. You deserve to be pampered. You never know, he may even give you the best foot and back rubs you’ve ever gotten in your life. Don’t worry about whether it will get thrown in your face or not. A man wouldn’t do such a thing, but a man child would. If it does happen, just say thank you and let him know you appreciate it. Even call him a sucker if you want him to feel it.

5. Relax

Everyone loves to come home and put their feet up from time to time. Go ahead and give him a blanket and offer him a drink or something to eat. Periodically ask if he’s okay and if he needs anything. Give him that same treatment he gives you on a regular basis.

6. Have your trust

There is no need to breathe down his next or go through his phone. Trust that he’s doing the right thing. He may say something he shouldn’t but trust that he isn’t trying to hurt. Men can be stupid and can say and do some really stupid things sometimes.

7. Help

You are not alone. You don’t have to hold anything in. Communication is important. Talk to each other about what’s going on. Do you want to get some pickles? Let him open the jar and show you how strong he is. It may not be a big deal to you, but it makes him feel needed. Let Super Man save you.

8. Spoil You

So he buys you gifts, cooks for you and wants to take you out to show you off. There’s no harm in that. He’s doing it because he loves you and wants to give you the world.

9. Deal With It

Have an issue with something or someone? Let him handle it. I’m not saying go scree up everything and expect him to come to your rescue. Here’s an example, the food you ordered isn’t cooked to your liking. Let him tell the wait staff the issue and get it fixed. You get what you want, and he gets the satisfaction of handling things for his lady.

10. Feel Appreciated

Manners can go a long way. A simple Please and Thank You can make him feel like a million bucks. It’s okay to pamper him and cook for him. Tell and show him that you are grateful for him and everything he does. Wash that dirty underwear and make them smell fresh and clean. Wash him too if that’s what you’re into.

I’ll receive a lot of backlash about this post but ask me is I care. Don’t do that. Just know that I don’t. This is what a man does and anyone who says differently is a man child. There is no reason why you should be dating a man or sleeping with him if he can’t do these things for you! You’re worth more than a piece of booty and something to look at. A real woman takes care of her man and a man does the same in return. Don’t argue with me! Just let it happen. I know it’s going to be hard to let it happen but just let it happen. It’s better than having a man that you do everything for, and everything is one-sided. There are two sides to every relationship. Not just your side. It is not every person for themselves. It’s,” I wash your back, you wash my back”!

Check out my last Dating Advice post. If you haven’t already, sign up for my email list and follow me on Instagram and Facebook. Enjoy your week!

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